6 Highly Recommended Oakland Premarital Counselors
Getting engaged and planning a wedding can be an exciting experience for couples, but preparing for marriage goes far beyond choosing flowers and venues. Many couples in this stage worry about navigating conflict, managing finances, or blending families—and wonder if they're truly ready for the commitment ahead, even though they truly care about each other.
At California Couples Counseling, we deeply understand these challenges—and how to support you and your partner as you navigate engagement. Our Oakland premarital counselors help you build a strong foundation before you say "I do," giving you the tools to create a lasting, fulfilling partnership. Meet our team here and reach out when you’re ready to begin.
What sets our practice apart from other Oakland premarital counseling providers
Finding the right premarital counselor can feel overwhelming—especially amidst the wedding planning chaos—but we've made it simple. Here's what makes California Couples Counseling different:
Online availability throughout California: Meet with your counselor from anywhere, no commute required.
Gottman Method-trained: All of our therapists are trained in this research-backed couples therapy approach.
Specialized in couples therapy: We focus exclusively on relationships, not just general mental health.
Flexible scheduling: Evening and weekend appointments are available to make therapy accesible for busy professionals.
Diverse team of clinicians: Match with a therapist who understands your unique background and needs.
Free consultation call: Get to know your therapist before committing.
As a specialized couples counseling practice, we’re passionate about support relationships at every stage. Reach out to start your premarital therapy journey today.
Quick compare therapists
| Therapist | Best For | Key Specialties | Training Highlights |
|---|---|---|---|
| Kierra Gordon-Smith, LMFT | Holistic, mind-body-spirit approach | Relationship issues, family conflict, trauma, infidelity & betrayal, work stress, self-esteem | Gottman Method trained |
| Tammie Makely, LMFT | Infidelity & sex addiction | Relationship issues, affair recovery & infidelity, sex addiction, sexual abuse, trauma, addiction | EMDR certified, Certified Anger Management Specialist, Gottman Method trained |
| Christopher Kelm, LMFT | Men’s issues | Relationship issues, affair recovery & infidelity, men’s issues, life transitions, stress & anger management | Gottman Method trained |
| Jennie Lopez, LMFT | LGBTQ+ couples | Relationship issues, trauma, LGBTQ+, family issues, stress management | Gottman Method trained, EMDR certified |
| Mandy Greaves, PhD, LMFT | Grief & loss | Relationship issues, anxiety, grief & loss, women’s issues, life transitions | Gottman Method trained |
| Daniel Moultrie, LMFT | Busy professionals and entrepreneurs | Relationship issues, men’s issues, depression, entrepreneurship, betrayal trauma | Founder, advanced Gottman Method training |
Jump to a therapist
Kierra Gordon-Smith: Best for holistic, mind-body-spirit approach
Tammie Makely: Best for infidelity & sex addiction
Christopher Kelm: Best for men's issues
Jennie Lopez: Best for LGBTQ+ couples
Mandy Greaves: Best for grief & loss
Daniel Moultrie: Best for busy professionals and entrepreneurs
Not sure which therapist is right for you? Contact us so we can match you.
Meet our premarital therapists
Kierra Gordon-Smith, LMFT
Best for holistic, mind-body-spirit approach
I'm passionate about helping engaged couples build relationships that honor the connection between mind, body, and spirit. My approach is client-centered and non-judgmental, creating space for both partners to be seen, heard, and supported as you prepare for marriage together.
Credentials: Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
Focus areas: Relationship issues, family conflict, trauma, infidelity & betrayal, work stress, self-esteem
Location: Virtual in Oakland
Tammie Makely, LMFT
Best for infidelity & sex addiction
I specialize in helping couples navigate complex challenges like infidelity and sex addiction before or during engagement, ensuring you build a foundation of honesty and trust going into your marriage. My training in EMDR and the Gottman Method, combined with my certification as an Anger Management Specialist, equips me to help you work through pain and create lasting healing.
Credentials: Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Certified Anger Management Specialist
Focus areas: Relationship issues, affair recovery & infidelity, sex addiction, sexual abuse, trauma, addiction
Location: Virtual in Oakland
Christopher Kelm, LMFT
Best for men’s issues
I understand the unique pressures men face when preparing for marriage—from expressing emotions to navigating expectations around partnership and masculinity. My approach creates a judgment-free space where male partners can explore vulnerabilities, strengthen communication, and show up authentically in their relationships.
Credentials: Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
Focus areas: Relationship issues, affair recovery & infidelity, men’s issues, life transitions, stress & anger management
Location: Virtual in Oakland
Jennie Lopez, LMFT
Best for LGBTQ+ couples
I create a safe, affirming space where LGBTQ+ couples feel truly seen and validated as they prepare for marriage. Drawing from Gottman Method training and EMDR, I tailor my approach to meet your unique relationship goals while celebrating your identities and honoring your lived experiences.
Credentials: Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
Focus areas: Relationship issues, trauma, LGBTQ+, family issues, stress management
Location: Virtual in Oakland
Mandy Greaves, PhD, LMFT
Best for grief & loss
I support engaged couples who are navigating loss—whether you're grieving a parent, dealing with infertility, or processing previous relationship trauma. My compassionate approach helps you honor your grief while building a strong foundation for your future marriage, ensuring past losses don't overshadow your path forward together.
Credentials: Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
Focus areas: Relationship issues, anxiety, grief & loss, women’s issues, life transitions
Location: Virtual in Oakland
Daniel Moultrie, LMFT
Best for busy professionals and entrepreneurs
I understand the unique pressures busy professionals face when planning a life together. My solution-oriented approach helps engaged couples develop practical communication strategies and create a relationship structure that supports both your personal ambitions and your partnership, without sacrificing quality time together.
Credentials: Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist
Focus areas: Relationship issues, men’s issues, depression, entrepreneurship, betrayal trauma
Location: Virtual in Oakland
Common areas we help premarital couples with
Communication patterns: Learning to express needs clearly and listen with empathy before frustration builds
Financial planning and values: Navigating money discussions, debt, spending habits, and long-term financial goals
Family dynamics and boundaries: Managing relationships with in-laws and establishing boundaries as a new family unit
Conflict resolution skills: Developing healthy ways to disagree without damaging the relationship
Intimacy and expectations: Discussing physical and emotional intimacy, sex, and affection needs openly
Life goals and vision alignment: Ensuring you're on the same page about career, children, location, and lifestyle
Roles and responsibilities: Clarifying expectations around household duties, decision-making, and division of labor
Blending families: Preparing for step-parenting, managing relationships with children from previous relationships
What to expect from the therapy process
Step 1: Free consultation call
We begin with a complimentary phone consultation where you'll share your goals and concerns while learning about our approach. This no-pressure conversation helps you determine if we're the right fit before scheduling your first session.
Step 2: Initial assessment & goal-setting
During your first session, your therapist will learn about your relationship history, current strengths, and areas you'd like to strengthen. Together, you'll identify specific goals and create a roadmap for your premarital counseling journey.
Step 3: Skill-building & exploration
Over subsequent sessions, you'll learn evidence-based communication tools, explore important topics like finances and intimacy, and practice new ways of connecting. Your therapist provides a safe space to address concerns and strengthen your foundation.
Step 4: Ongoing support & preparation
As your wedding approaches, your therapist helps you navigate any emerging concerns and reinforces the skills you've developed. You'll leave feeling confident and prepared to build the marriage you both envision.
FAQs about premarital counseling
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Most couples benefit from starting premarital counseling 6-12 months before the wedding, though it's never too early or too late. This timeframe allows enough sessions to address important topics without the stress of last-minute wedding planning. Some couples begin even earlier when they get engaged.
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Research shows that couples who complete premarital counseling report a higher marital success rate and report greater relationship satisfaction. The Gottman Method specifically has been validated through 40+ years of research with thousands of couples demonstrating significant improvements in communication and conflict resolution.
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Insurance typically does not cover premarital counseling since it's considered preventive rather than treatment for a diagnosed condition. You can learn more about our packages and payment options here.
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You'll explore essential topics like communication styles, conflict resolution, financial management, intimacy expectations, family planning, in-law relationships, household responsibilities, and life goals. Your therapist tailors discussions to your unique concerns and circumstances, ensuring you address what matters most to your relationship.
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Most couples attend 4-8 premarital therapy sessions, with each session lasting about 50 minutes. However, the exact length can be customized to you and your partner’s unique situation.
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Absolutely not. While some couples seek faith-based premarital counseling through their religious community, our approach is secular and evidence-based. We welcome couples of all backgrounds—religious, spiritual, agnostic, or atheist—and tailor our approach to align with your values and beliefs.
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Not at all. Seeking premarital counseling demonstrates maturity, commitment, and wisdom. Just as you'd plan financially or legally before marriage, preparing emotionally and relationally shows you're invested in long-term success. The strongest couples are often those who proactively build skills rather than waiting for problems.