San Francisco Non-Monogamy & Polyamory Friendly Therapist
Navigating multiple relationships can bring unique joys and complex challenges. Whether you're struggling with jealousy, communication across partners, or establishing healthy boundaries—or just starting to explore the idea of ethical non-monogamy—you deserve support that truly understands and celebrates all relationship structures.
At California Couples Counseling, we provide specialized care for those in or considering polyamorous relationships, without any of the stigma or judgment you may be worried about encountering in traditional couples therapy.
Meet our poly-friendly therapist serving San Francisco
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![polyamory friendly therapist]()
Tammie Makely, LMFT
Tammie brings a non-judgmental, down-to-earth approach to supporting diverse relationship structures. With specialized training in evidence-based approaches like EMDR and the Gottman Method, she understands that non-monogamous relationships require unique skills for managing multiple connections, processing complex emotions, and maintaining healthy communication patterns. Her calming presence creates a safe space for exploring the intricacies of polyamorous and open relationships.
Good fit for: Polyamory & ethical non-monogamy, trauma, codependency, substance abuse, sex addiction, affair recovery & infidelity
Credentials: Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist MFC 113186, Certified Anger Management Specialist, Certified in EMDR
Clientele: Adults, couples, polycules
Location: San Francisco, CA 94102
Virtual therapy: Yes
Common reasons why people in polyamorous or non-monogamous relationships seek therapy
—Considering ethical non-monogamy for the first time
—Establishing and maintaining healthy boundaries with partners
—Improving communication skills for complex relationship dynamics
—Processing feelings of inadequacy or comparison between partners
—Navigating time management and prioritization challenges
—Addressing trust issues or relationship betrayals
—Managing jealousy and insecurity across multiple relationships
—Working through family or social judgment about relationship choices
—Managing mental health concerns that impact multiple relationships
—Exploring identity and personal values within non-monogamous frameworks
—Dealing with breakups or relationship transitions in poly networks
How polyamory therapy can help
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Develop essential communication skills
Effective communication becomes even more crucial when managing multiple relationships. Therapy helps you develop clear, honest communication habits to help you express yourselves and truly hear others, preventing misunderstandings and conflicts that can ripple across your entire relationship network.
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Build trust & security
Trust is a key part of any relationship, including polyamorous ones. Therapy offers a supportive place to develop secure attachment patterns, create emotional safety, and rebuild trust if a betrayal takes place. You'll learn to foster reliability and transparency that strengthens all your connections.
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Establish healthy boundaries
Creating and maintaining appropriate boundaries protects both your individual well-being and your relationships. Therapy helps you identify your limits, communicate them clearly, and respect others' boundaries to build sustainable relationship structures.
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Process complex emotions
Like any relationship, non-monogamous relationships can bring up intense feelings of love, fear, excitement, and uncertainty simultaneously. Therapy offers a safe space to explore these complex emotions, understand their origins, and develop healthy ways to process and express them.
FAQs about polyamory therapy
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We support people across the full spectrum of consensual non-monogamous relationship styles, including polyamory, open relationships, swinging, relationship anarchy, and other ethical non-monogamous arrangements, in addition to “traditional” monogamous relationships. Our therapists understand that every relationship configuration has unique dynamics and challenges, and we tailor our approach to honor your specific needs, values, and goals.
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Ethical non-monogamy is the umbrella term for all consensual relationships involving multiple partners. Polyamory typically involves multiple romantic or emotional relationships, while open relationships often focus on sexual connections outside the primary partnership. However, we recognize that relationships are defined by their participants, and we aren’t here to bring assumptions or labels to your connections.
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Therapy begins with learning more about what brings you into therapy and what your goals are for our work together. During this time, we’ll also be focused on building a trusting therapeutic relationship, which lays the foundation for deeper work in sessions. Gradually, we’ll begin to move toward processing past experiences that may be impacting your connections, expressing deeper emotions, working on communication skills, and learning how to navigate your relationship(s) in a healthy, sustainable way.
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Our practice is specifically focused on therapy for relationships (particularly intimate partnerships), making us a good fit for any person, couple, or polycule that wants to strengthen their connection. We blend evidence-based approaches like the Gottman method with genuine care for our clients and passion for this work, so if you’re looking for therapy that’s both highly effective and personable, we could be a great match. Plus, our sessions are exclusively online, so you can get support from anywhere in California.
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To get started, simply book your free consultation in our online scheduler. During this brief call, we’ll discuss what you’re looking for, answer any questions, and get a sense of whether we’re a good fit. If you choose to move forward, we’ll schedule your first session and let the deeper work of therapy begin.