6 San Francisco Discernment Counselors Ready for Hire
If you're questioning whether your relationship can survive or if it's time to separate, you know how emotionally exhausting and confusing this crossroads can be.
Discernment counseling provides a structured space to explore your options without the pressure to immediately fix your relationship or commit to divorce.
At California Couples Counseling, we understand the unique complexity of relationships in crisis and offer specialized, compassionate support during this critical decision-making period.
Here, we introduce you to our expert discernment counselors and provide guidance to help you find clarity about your relationship's future.
Highly recommended San Francisco discernment therapists
Best for parents considering separation: Georgina Crisanto
Best for LGBTQ+ couples in crisis: Jennie Lopez
Best for couples navigating betrayal: Tammie Makely
Best for men navigating relationship crossroads: Christopher Kelm
Best for high-achieving professionals: Daniel Moultrie
Best for couples facing life transitions: Mandy Greaves
Why trust us?
Our therapists bring specialized training in discernment counseling methodology—a unique approach that focuses on helping couples gain clarity and make informed decisions rather than immediately attempting to repair the relationship. We also bring extensive training in the Gottman Method and other evidence-based relationship interventions, providing a comprehensive skill set for supporting couples in crisis.
How we selected
Here, we’ve showcased our therapists who specialize in discernment counseling, along with extensive experience supporting couples in crisis. Beyond discernment therapy alone, these clinicians are also trained in other couples therapy modalities and have additional specialty areas to ensure a comprehensive approach to this sensitive work.
Meet the therapists
Georgina Crisanto, LMFT
Best for parents considering separation
| Good fit for: | Not a fit for: |
|---|---|
| Parents | Those seeking court-mandated therapy |
| Couples struggling with conflict | Those seeking in-network care |
| Those seeking virtual sessions | Those seeking in-person sessions |
Key logistics:
Offers discernment counseling: ✓
Clientele: Adults
Location: San Francisco, CA
Virtual therapy?: Yes
Georgina specializes in helping couples facing relationship difficulties make important decisions about their future. Her approach to discernment counseling creates a safe, supportive space where partners can explore their options without judgment, helping them understand whether their relationship can be restored or if separation is the healthiest path forward.
Key logistics:
Offers discernment counseling: ✓
Clientele: Adults
Location: San Francisco, CA
Virtual therapy?: Yes
Jennie brings specialized EMDR training and LGBTQ+ affirming care to discernment counseling. She creates a judgment-free space where couples can explore their relationship's future while addressing any trauma or identity-related factors that may be influencing their decision-making process.
| Good fit for: | Not a fit for: |
|---|---|
| LGBTQ+ relationships | Those seeking specialized addiction care |
| Couples impacted by trauma | Those seeking court-mandated therapy |
| Those seeking virtual sessions | Those seeking in-person sessions |
Jennie Lopez, LMFT
Best for LGBTQ+ couples in crisis
Tammie Makely, LMFT
Best for couples navigating betrayal
| Good fit for: | Not a fit for: |
|---|---|
| Couples considering separation after infidelity or betrayal | Those seeking court-mandated therapy |
| Partners struggling with anger and high-conflict dynamics | Those seeking specialized anger management therapy |
| Those seeking virtual sessions | Those seeking in-person sessions |
Key logistics:
Offers discernment counseling: ✓
Clientele: Adults
Location: San Francisco, CA
Virtual therapy?: Yes
Tammie specializes in helping couples navigate the complex decisions that arise after betrayal or infidelity. Her discernment counseling approach combines affair recovery expertise with anger management skills, helping partners determine whether their relationship can heal from significant breaches of trust.
Christopher Kelm, LMFT
Best for men navigating relationship crossroads
| Good fit for: | Not a fit for: |
|---|---|
| Men struggling with relationship decisions and emotional intimacy | Couples seeking quick-fix solutions |
| Couples facing trust issues after infidelity | Partners uncomfortable with deeper emotional exploration |
| Those seeking virtual sessions | Those seeking in-person sessions |
Key logistics:
Offers discernment counseling: ✓
Clientele: Adults
Location: San Francisco, CA
Virtual therapy?: Yes
Christopher brings a compassionate, nuanced approach to discernment counseling, particularly for men facing difficult relationship decisions. His work helps partners explore whether their relationship can thrive through rebuilding trust and emotional connection, or if separation is a healthier path forward for both individuals.
Daniel Moultrie, LMFT
Best for high-achieving professionals
| Good fit for: | Not a fit for: |
|---|---|
| Busy professionals and entrepreneurs managing relationship stress | Couples seeking court-mandated therapy |
| Partners struggling with work-life balance impacting their relationship | Those needing specialized trauma or addiction treatment |
| Those seeking virtual sessions | Those seeking in-person sessions |
Key logistics:
Offers discernment counseling: ✓
Clientele: Adults
Location: San Francisco, CA
Virtual therapy?: Yes
Daniel understands the unique pressures high-achieving professionals face when relationship challenges arise. His approach to discernment counseling helps couples determine whether their partnership can accommodate demanding careers and personal growth, or if their paths have diverged in ways that make separation a better choice for both parties.
Mandy Greaves, PhD, LMFT
Best for couples facing life transitions
| Good fit for: | Not a fit for: |
|---|---|
| Couples navigating major life transitions and relationship uncertainty | Couples seeking court-mandated therapy |
| Partners dealing with grief, loss, or overwhelming life stress | Those primarily seeking a brief, solution-focused approach |
| Those seeking virtual sessions | Those seeking in-person sessions |
Key logistics:
Offers discernment counseling: ✓
Clientele: Adults
Location: San Francisco, CA
Virtual therapy?: Yes
Dr. Greaves brings decades of clinical experience and academic expertise to discernment counseling. Her approach helps couples thoughtfully examine whether their relationship can weather significant life transitions, or if the changes they're facing signal a need to reconsider their partnership's viability and direction.
FAQs about discernment therapy
-
A discernment counselor helps couples gain clarity about the direction of their relationship when they’re unsure whether to move forward or separate. Unlike traditional couples therapy, the goal isn't necessarily to fix the relationship, but to help each partner understand their options and make an informed decision about their next steps.
-
California Couples Counseling operates as a private pay practice and is out-of-network with insurance providers. However, we can provide you with a superbill that you may submit to your insurance for potential reimbursement. Many clients find the investment worthwhile given the significant life decisions being explored in this process.
-
Discernment therapy can be invaluable when you're facing such a pivotal choice. It provides structure and professional guidance during an emotionally turbulent time, helping you avoid impulsive choices you might later regret. The insights gained often save emotional energy and help couples move forward with confidence no matter which direction they choose.
-
Discernment therapy is most beneficial when one or both partners feel uncertain about the relationship's future, when you're contemplating separation but aren't completely sure, or when you're stuck in cycles of conflict without resolution. If you're asking, "Should we stay together or separate?" this specialized support can help.
-
Our approach integrates discernment counseling principles with trauma-informed care and evidence-based methods. We focus on helping each partner gain individual insight about their needs, values, and goals while exploring what's realistically possible for the relationship. The process is structured, time-limited, and designed to reduce ambiguity about next steps.
-
Discernment counseling typically involves 1-5 sessions focused on exploration and understanding rather than immediate change. You'll examine your relationship's strengths and challenges, explore your individual concerns and hopes, and gain perspective about whether your partnership has the potential for positive transformation. The process concludes with clear direction about your path forward.
-
Our practice is ideal if you value research-backed approaches, need specialized expertise for a relationship that’s in limbo, and want a therapist who understands the unique challenges of this decision-making process. We're particularly well-suited for couples who appreciate structured therapeutic frameworks and prefer virtual therapy for convenience and privacy.
-
Begin with a free consultation call where we'll discuss your situation, explain our methodology, and determine if discernment counseling matches your needs. If we move forward, we'll schedule your first session and begin the process of making decisions about your relationship's future.